This past week in the Lead Always Forum, we spoke about practice. Not theory, or another list of things we already know we should be doing. Practice.

Leadership begins with leading ourselves
People arrived because they want to lead better. Not only their people, but themselves.

That is what the Forum is about: discovering how to do better for ourselves so that we can do better for others, inviting the ripple effect to continue its work.

Most of us already know a great deal. We know we should pause before reacting. We know it helps to breathe. We know that writing things down can bring clarity. We know movement is good for us. We know we need to listen better, pay attention and become more aware of the impact we have on the people around us.

Knowing better does not mean we do better
The problem is not always that we do not know better. The problem is being able to consistently do better when pressure, distraction or old habits take over. That is where practice comes in.

Like a professional sportsman preparing long before the big game, we practise our craft so that a different response becomes the default response when we need that skill. It becomes second nature: a deeply entrenched neural pathway, activated to provide the response we need in that moment of need, or performance.

How we arrive changes the room
Imagine starting a meeting with a minute of silence. When our business was bought out, the tension in every room was palpable. One day I asked the new owners if we could start differently. A pause, a check-in. Two laughed. The other said, let’s try it. Something shifted.

I saw one of these men a while back. He mentioned that they do this with all their new acquisitions now, and it continues to shift rooms.

We do it in every Forum session too. Not a “How are you?” question with the standard “Fine, thank you” response.

This time, we used a PIES check-in: physically, intellectually, emotionally and spiritually.

It is quite amazing what we discover when we pause long enough to write down how we are actually feeling in these different parts of ourselves.

This is not an invitation to vent or overshare. It is a way of honouring how someone is arriving in the room, so that we can work with what is there.

It also matters for the person leading the meeting. How we arrive affects the room.

From there, we moved into the pause.

The pause itself is simple
What is harder, and perhaps more important, is noticing that we need one, and remembering that we can take it.

A pause can last a split second before we react. It can be a breath. A walk around the block. A conversation with someone we trust. It can also be a decision to wait until tomorrow before replying to an email.

The purpose is not to avoid responsibility or delay action. It is to create enough space to choose what to do next.

We explored breathing practices, meditation, journalling, movement and embodied awareness. None of these are complicated. Their value comes from repetition.

You do not have to choose all of them. You need to find the one that resonates and becomes possible in your world. Returning to ourselves, again and again.

Meditation, for example, is not about quieting the mind. The mind does not suddenly become quiet because we have decided to sit still. The practice is noticing that the mind has wandered, and returning again. And again. To our breath. To ourselves.

Journalling slows things down. It asks us to be honest. It helps us see what happened, what we felt, and what we may be telling ourselves about it. Sometimes what we have been treating as fact is simply a story we have repeated often enough.

Movement and embodied awareness remind us that the body often knows what the mind has not yet made sense of. The jaw tightens. The shoulders rise. The breath changes. The stomach contracts. The body is communicating long before we have found the words.

The pursuit of happiness
One of the practices that stood out most strongly in the room was awe and wonder.

It may seem like an unusual leadership practice. And yes, it probably is, until you understand why.

We tend to think of leading as being about decisions, direction, action and getting things done. Awe and wonder can sound too soft, too simple, or too far removed from the pressure of the working day, but perhaps that is exactly why we need it. Let me explain.

We are constantly being pulled towards what is wrong, urgent, most noisy or demanding. Being in a state of awe and wonder invites us to widen our perspective.

To notice the mountains in the distance, the early morning light, the sound of someone laughing, a piece of music, the smell of jasmine, or the shape of a flame.

These moments do not make the difficult things disappear. They remind us that the difficult thing is not the only thing.

The more we practise consciously seeking moments of awe and wonder, the more we begin to notice it without being asked.

Science has shown that awe and wonder can enhance cognitive function, expand our perspective and improve our ability to think critically and solve problems. It also helps modulate emotions, fostering a sense of calm.

By the end of the session, people were choosing the practices they wanted to carry into the week. Just one. A pause. A few minutes of meditation. Writing something down. Moving the body. Becoming more present. Looking for awe and wonder.

Practice begins small. It begins with noticing. It compounds. And it begins with returning when we miss a day, without turning the lapse into self-judgment.

Creating the ripple effect
What we practise repeatedly becomes more available when the moment asks something of us. And that is where the ripple effect begins.

When we learn to pause, we arrive with greater awareness, and the room feels different.

When we become more present, people feel seen.

When we lead ourselves with greater steadiness, it becomes possible to do the same for others.

So perhaps the question is not only, “What do I need to do better?”

Perhaps it is:

What do I need to practise now, so that it is available to me when I need it most?